Tuesday, December 11, 2012

on Santa and the elves and such

Sometimes I feel compelled to write about something.

Sometimes it's a funny story, sometimes it's serious, and sometimes it's just something I feel strongly about.

Sometimes I struggle with the right words, and then sometimes, I stumble upon someone else's words that communicate so perfectly what I want to say. Before you click on that link to a post written by someone else, here are a few of my thoughts on the subject.

I've been asked more than a few times recently if we've had 'Santa pictures' made, or if we have an 'elf'. Now hear me out before I respond, and before you start hatin' on me- if you take your child to the mall to sit in the big guy's lap or if you have a mischievous elf at home, then more power to ya. I think those things are fine and good, but when the holiday that we celebrate in December has become SO far removed from what it's really about, then something is wrong.

And friends, I feel that something is wrong.

I'm not anti-Santa picture, but I've never taken my kiddos to sit in the big guy's lap. Our school will have a santa here next week to take photos with the kids, and Oliver will have his picture taken. But it's not about that. Yes, he's asked before if he's real. We've talked about it and I will never look at my child and crush his spirit- I simply leave it up to him by saying, "what do you think?", and he's still at an age where he believes. And that's ok. He even asked about our chimney on the way to school and wondered if Santa could, in fact, get into the house that way. I love that he's still young enough to think about that, but I don't want him to modify his behaviour or strive to impress a man in a red suit. It's not about that.

I'm not anti-elf, but I will never make a mess in my house and lead my children to believe that a stuffed toy did it, nor will I ever tell them that a stuffed toy is watching them and they'd better be good if they want more stuff. I don't want them believing in a stuffed toy. I want them to be good and do the right thing because it's what God wants them to do. Christmas is not about a stuffed toy. And also- they don't need more stuff.

When Oliver was younger, and an only child, we subscribed to the 'overboard' method. Presents and toys were piled HIGH on Christmas morning, and why not? We had no other children to buy gifts for. He also received an enormous amount of goodies from our family and friends. So much stuff that there wasn't enough space to fit it in his room. Or our house. When the girls came along, we dialed it down a bit, but made no huge adjustments until last year. I had a few friends who subscribed to the idea of, "Jesus got three gifts, so each of our kids gets three gifts", and I thought it was brilliant. That's what we tried to do last year, and we stuck to it for the most part aside from a couple of last minute nerf guns that went into O's pile.

We'll be doing that again this year, and I'd really really like to keep it to just three. Tres. Trois. That's it. They'll still get plenty of goodies from their grandparents and again, they have plenty already. I don't want Christmas at our house to be about stuff, but about the greatest gift of all. That's what it's about. Jesus.

That's it.

Seriously- that's it.

Now, I'm not a tyrant. Don't think I ban all things santa at our casa- because I don't. We watched Island of the Misfit Toys a few night ago because it's a classic and I love it. We listen to Christmas music in the car because Christmas music rocks. We sing along to Santa Claus is Coming to Town at the top of our lungs because that's good stuff right there. My girls wear smocked santa's on their dresses to church because smocked santa's are cute. Eliza was even wearing a smocked santa underneath her Mary costume in the children's program at our church last Sunday night. MM refused to wear a costume altogether, but that's neither here nor there.

The post I mentioned earlier is HERE, and was written by Jen Hatmaker- yes the Jen Hatmaker of 7. Her words and thoughts are the same as mine, but she's a far better writer than me which is why I urge you to read HER post on the subject. I also love Britt's post about how she and her husband are celebrating Christmas with their two young kiddos, although I don't have plans to try and remove santa from our celebration altogether. I just want him to play a tiny role. Teeny-tiny.

So there ya have it. A few of my thoughts, along with those from a couple of like-minded gals. I know that many will not agree with me, and that's ok. Like I said- I felt compelled. And when I feel compelled, I have to speak my mind, or in this case, sit down and type.

Comments (4)

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Hey, I follow you on Twitter and stopped by to read this post. I applaud you for stepping out and saying how you feel. Our family does not do Santa either. From the get-go, my husband was adamant that we not teach the kids that he is real. He's always said, WHY would we add something false to the story of what Christmas is really about. Over the years, we've received a lot of negative feedback (mostly from family members) but we've stuck to it, (even though my daughter did sit on his lap for a picture this year. weird) and now I'm glad that we have. Thanks for your words!
Susan Fulks's avatar

Susan Fulks · 642 weeks ago

Ahhhhhhhh..ha! Ha! I laugh! Oh the memories of Christmas past!!! First of all, Jim wants to be the Griswalds of our neighborhood! That means that in August, when it is 110 degrees outside, and kids are swimming in the pool, we start bringing out HUGE strands of lights, plug 'me up, and see which lights are not working. This alone takes one month. Then we drag out Christmas lawn-thingys sculptures (we have Pooh, teddy bear, two trains, snowman, dog, penguin, deer, and a nutcracker, and much, much more!) and do a detail check on each one, making sure it moves rights, and checking those lights! It's not even Halloween! Plus..we add something each year..this year it was a new car! Then around Thanksgiving, we start hanging the million strands of lights that will wrap around the house, in several rows, and finish off around bushes, light poles, yard swings, and the fence around the pool! The pool has a Christmas fountain. Jim does the outside, I do the inside. God help us all! I'm still hanging garland and wreaths! But I will tell you a point, while decorating, when you know you have reached the point of Christmas-of-no return...your husband has a Martha Stewart moment! He spray paints the hay bales, we used for fall decor, WHITE to look like icebergs!!! (That actually was a good idea!)! AND then you spend 3 weeks...wrapping each gift that Martha Steward would be proud of, just to see it torn apart in 3 seconds or less! We use a stop watch now! Let me take a breath, no, wait, I don't have time for that! And while you are watching your "wee" ones play with the big box the Barbie Dream House came in, you have a "passing" moment...which is..I can't wait until they get older, and no more Toys, no more Santa coming down the pretend fireplace, and no more "black Friday!" Because now all we have to do is buy the latest iPhone, the iPad 10, and Pottery Barn bedroom, for a teenage girl...and the money spent would have bought 7 Barbie Dreamhouse, plus the corvette car, with Ken sitting in the driver's seat! I plead with God...please let her be four again!!!

We did do the elf. Her name was Kelly, she showed up on the fireplace mantle the day after Thanksgiving(black Friday), with her little elf house, and magic dust! Kelly didn't want to make just a mess..oh no, Kelly liked to "hide!" We found her in the dryer, twice in the trunk of the car, a couple of times in the mailbox, in the shower, trunks, dog kennel, and in the refrigerator. Katie didn't like the part where we had to put Kelly under the Christmas tree, on Christmas Eve, so Santa can take the elf back to the North Pole, unril she would show up the following year on the fireplace mantel, Thanksgiving night! The scary part is that my now is playing a game of "hide and seek" with Kelly! That's right, my 15 year old will hide Kelly, and I have to find her! Then it's my turn...and Katie has to find her! Pour Kelly...I think she would really like it if Santa will take her away from this deranged family, and back to the North Pole! Ain't goin' to happen...its my turn to hide Kelly tonight!

AND don't me started on how to shedule a birthday party a week before Christmas! I think I'll put Kelly the Elf on top of her birthday cake!
Well put MK
Excellent post, MK. Thanks for sharing. We're in the same boat!

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